¡Órale! 5 Original, Badass and Totally Inexplicable Mexico-Inspired Tattoos

Nautical Stars? Sure, if there’s a time machine and a Sum 41 audition involved.

The latest rage embraced by paisas and whities alike stars is the sort of gnarly, DIY snake-devouring, Sharpie-eyebrowed imagery once only seen in the holding pens of Almoloya.  

Are you brave enough to don a  permanent Salsa Señor, a hitting target or a heresy PB &J?

The good news is you don’t have to. Some other pendejo already did.

Here we go:

Shortly after sponsoring Arizona’s SB1070, State Senator Russell Pearce claims he was “abducted by some Home Depot-types.” Surprisingly, he was released completely unscathed some 4 hours later. “The details are fuzzy,” he says; “but other that unexplainable giggles from the muchachos every time I go to the carwash, I came out unscathed.” Source

Cynthia is a first-generation American who lost in the hipster subculture has severely distanced herself from her Mexi roots. “Why you wear weird glasses and your abuelita’s dresses?” her mamá constantly asks. “And take a sweater for Christ’s sake, its freezing!” Causing Cynthia to scoff and roll her eyes. Simultaneously wanting to get in touch with her culture and get an ironic arm tattoo that would soften her already existing Chupacabras one, she opted for this festive piñata. Sadly, on her way home from the parlor she got jumped by a gang of  kids which armed with broomsticks beat her to a pulp, demanding for candy fall out. She learned her lesson last night, and now always leaves the home with a sweater. Source

Mocking his religious upbringing, this dude decided to go whole hog. “I’ll do it as a statement against those religious zealots,” he thought. “Hold on, specifically those that see holy imagery on food, like say, a piece of toast,” he mused. “Ah man, I fuckin’ got it! I’ll take the beloved image of Our Lady of Guadalupe and I’ll ask for her face to be turned into a burnt slice of bread! Oh…and instead of her dress, it’ll be a smudge of grape jelly, oh and she’ll further be defaced by wearing oven gloves and having a jar of peanut butter and a winged toaster at her feet,” he continued. “Jackpot!” he was heard shouting; “I’ll get her as a tramp stamp! Nah…that’d be sacrilegious.” Source   

Let’s face it: Lexington, KY doesn’t exactly have the most happening gay pride parade; so 37-year old Cody decided to kick it up a notch and add some extra flair in the form of a rockin’ piece of body art. “What can I get that truly reflects my persona?” He thought. “Something that says yes I’ll PNP, but I have standards.” Tossing and turning, he decided to Fouth Meal it. Seventeen minutes, Four Blackjack Tacos, a 20 oz.  Orange ‘n Crème Swirl Frutista Freeze and a nasty case of explosive diarrhea later, a sweaty Cody looked down at the toilet bowl as he was getting ready to flush and letting out a grin yelped: “I’ve got it!” Source

Blood unites Pablo and his cousin Heriberto; but their choice of hot sauces divides them. Pablo favors Tapatío, while Heriberto (“Beto” for short) is more of a Cholula kinda guy. Their Capulet/Montague competition has not come without its stellar one-upping moments including the time that Pablo got a bumper sticker depicting his salsa’s trademark charro with the words “contents are muy caliente,” and his primo got a rear window decal for his truck featuring the Cholula lady with a strapped-on gold AK-47 and the message “Lady Killa” scrolled throughout. Tired of being clowned on—and buzzed after a mid-day kickback—Pablo deviced the perfect plan to outshine his cuz on brand loyalty. 

The following day he entered treatment and now favors the more sensible pico de gallo. Source

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