Honorary Mexican: the GOP edition

My abuelita always used to say: “Los machos no lloran” (macho men don’t cry) and trust me, she meant it.

Once, after I fell from my Pogo Ball, she duct taped 2 sponges underneath my eyes and threatened to throw my Cabbage Patch Kid into the fireplace if they showed even the slightest hint of moisture. Yes, I had a Cabbage Patch doll. Go ahead, chuckle it up.

Sold! Speaker of the House John Boehner's overcompensating gavel

Regardless, John Boehner, I dub thee Honorary Mexican.

On Wednesday, January 5 the misty-eyed veteran Republican took charge as the 61st speaker of the House of Representatives, marking a sad end to the Pelosi bitchy bob era. One good thing that came out of it however, is Boehner’s larger-than-life gavel—a clear homage to El Chapulín Colorado.

It’s a sad fact that we’re short on superheroes south of the border—Bruce Wayne is afraid the Batmobile will be left on cinder blocks, and Aquaman has been warned time and time again not to drink the water, so we hold on to the precious few we got: Chanoc, El Santo, and Roberto Gómez Bolaños’ vinyl antennaed opus, El Chapulín.

He had several tricks up his crimson Lycra sleeve including a paralyzing horn (la chicharra paralizadora) and miraculous minimizing pills (pastillas de chiquitolina), but none as great as the Boehner-approved squeaky mallet, el chipote chillón.

Bumbling, insecure, and using the catchphrase “more agile than a turtle, stronger than a mouse, nobler than a head of lettuce,” the Red Grasshopper never really saved the day but oftentimes made it increasingly worse.

Still, his legacy lives on.

So here’s to you Mr. Speaker, the highest Chapulín doppelgänger around (after The SimpsonsBumblebee Man that is).

When faced with challenges, may you tackle them as swiftly as Chapulín did Hitler in the video bellow. Cue the laugh track.  

Boehner image by AP Photo/Charles Dharapak. Chapulín’s by Televisa.

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